It's that time of year again ...

... when traffic is heavy, tempers are short, and Hungry Ghost bread will not reserve 2 loaves of my husband's favorite bread so that I can pick it up at a time that is convenient for me. Instead, I had to be at their door when they opened at 9 a.m. yesterday to make sure it was not already sold out.

Then I hurried off to Chair Yoga class, then to work, where there are all sorts of cookies, candy and coffee cake in the staff room. After work, I made a second trip to Northampton Center to buy vitamins at Cornucopia Foods.

This is also the time of VERY little daylight, as yesterday was the first official day of winter. I prefer summer. When it's dark, I feel cold regardless of the temperature. At least the weather has been relatively warm.

For me, because my family met and exchanged gifts last Sunday, Christmas feels over and done with and I'm ready to do "normal" things. Instead, my schedule is all askew. I'm working 3 days in a row this week and next.

Besides enjoying the uncommonly warm weather, I'm really looking forward to having 4 days in a row to hang around the house, tidy up, loaf around and read.

And I do, very much, love to see all of the Christmas lights on people's houses. They make me smile. I suppose the advantage of driving home in the dark is that I can see them better.

So and So

So have you noticed how many comments and questions begin with the word "So"?

So is this something new, or have I just not noticed it until recently?

So is "So", like, the new "Like"?

So shall I stop putting quote marks around "So"? So it would be easier to compose this post.

So I understand that a "prologue" (there go those quotes again) of sorts alerts people that one is about to say something, sort of like "Excuse me". So that doesn't explain seeing "So" begin an email or FB post, which I frequently see.

So language evolves and different people develop they're own "oral crutches" as they say in Toastmasters. So while I've never used a lot of "ahs" or "ums", it was during my several years as a member of Toastmasters that I became hyper-aware of how often such fillers are used in conversation.

So I guess "So" as a beginning word has, like, penetrated our culture, you know?

Anniversaries and the Letter "F"

Last week was Thanksgiving. It marks a milestone in my life different from the traditional giving thanks and turkey dinner. On the Monday after Thanksgiving in 1967, I began my first full-time library job. It was at the UMass/Amherst library - then Goodell - typing the headings on the tops of catalog cards and then filing them into the card catalog. I'm so glad that those labor-intensive cards are gone.

Who would have thought that 48 years later I'd still be "wearing the sensible shoes" as they sometimes say on the AUTOCAT email list.

As I consider retirement, perhaps I should keep this date in mind. In two years it will be an even 50. Now that's something to celebrate.

On the MassCat front, I've finally cracked the letter "F" in my alphabetical list of possible duplicates. I've been working on F for a couple of weeks now. To put this in perspective, I briefly blogged about arriving at "E" in early May and "D" in June of 2014. Even though everything is automated, it's still pretty labor-intensive.

Chair Yoga and Tolerance

The Hatfield Senior Center offers Chair Yoga on Tuesday mornings. I've been going for a couple of years now. I'd prefer to practice "full-blown" mat Yoga, but this is free and convenient. It's also more of a workout than one might think.

Whether on a mat or chair, a Yoga practitioner is to remain focused on his/her own body and not watch what others are doing (or not doing). That's part of the discipline.

There is a woman named D. who often attends the class. She usually arrives a few minutes after we've begun, and I find it a little distracting. If there is not an empty chair, the instructor has to fetch two more. (We use two chairs for several of the postures.) D. has many physical limitations and cannot lift even a light chair.

D. also chooses to do a couple of the postures standing. She uses a neoprene knee support for some, but not all, of them. The knee support attaches with velcro which makes a distinctive sound as she puts it on and takes it off.

I have to admit to getting annoyed. Is D. oblivious to the multiple distractions she creates for the others in the group? Or am I the only person who feels this way?

I try to remember that D. is often in pain, that she comes to Chair Yoga to help mitigate that pain and to try to keep her body functioning as well as it can. I try to treat the distractions she causes as a challenge and keep focused on my own postures. After all, that's part of the discipline.

I do, however, wish she would arrive on time.

Resistance

I don't know why I have so much trouble posting to this blog on a regular basis. It's not as if I don't think about it. It's not as if I don't have (in my opinion) interesting posts to make.

During the day, I'll see or hear something that provokes a thought that might be interesting to develop on this blog. After all, that's why I started it - as well as chronicling my journey through a possible career change. The career change, though, is slowly but surely morphing into retirement.

Perhaps impending retirement is a good post for today.

Over the last few months, I feel as if my interest in being a librarian is seeping away. Once upon a time it was all I wanted to do. I have opportunities to work, but I am totally uninterested. I could give more continuing education programs, but just don't want to put the effort into marketing.

At the moment, I am perfectly content working 18 hours/week at MassCat where I correct typos (see the Portuguese Picket Dictionary), upgrade incomplete records, merge duplicate records, find records when member libraries cannot, or create records if they do not exist. The work is very detailed and requires lots of concentration. Many would find it boring. I get into the Zen of it.

I still enjoy leading the senior exercise class twice each week (and attending a third time). I sometimes think that some area of exercise or health would be a good career for me. Recently, I saw an article in the local newspaper (I still read a newspaper every day) about wellness coaches and I had a burst of enthusiasm for becoming one. However, after reading information about the training and requirements, I began to realize it would be a major commitment. And I'm not very good at bossing people around; at insisting someone do something he/she doesn't want to do. I don't think I could be firm enough to be effective.

So, for the moment, I'll continue my current schedule, enjoy reading lots of books, and make resolutions (which I sometimes keep) to clean the house more often.

Loss

On the same weekend, two people I know died.

H. was in my exercise class. She had been ill for the last several months and her death was not unexpected. Until she became ill, she was an active member of several communities: church, historical society, and service organizations as well as attending exercise class. She was in her mid 80s, but still tough, smart and witty; always dressed nicely, had her hair done regularly, and wore make-up whenever I saw her. She was tiny, but a powerhouse. She will be missed.

The second person I didn't know very well; her husband and I serve together on a committee. He missed some meetings a few years ago because she had been diagnosed with ovarian cancer. They're both a few years younger and I am. I began to write brief messages to her on pretty note cards, wishing her well. I sent her postcards when I went on vacation and even just from home. Chemotherapy was successful and she recovered. I had a chance to meet her in person. She was delightful and charming and I thoroughly enjoyed our conversations.

Then, the cancer returned; she began treatments, I began sending cards. After a few weeks, she and the doctors decided the treatments just weren't working and they ceased. She died. I sent a card to her husband telling him that even though I had only met her a couple of times and didn't know her well, I liked her very much.

Death is all part of the life cycle. Still, when it happens to someone I know, I'm always a little shaken. My world, the entire world, changes a little bit.

Time or Money?

Which do I value more? Which do I need more?

It appears, time wins - at least for now. I'm perfectly content with my 3 partial days-per-week job at MassCat. There have been the sporadic continuing education workshops in Connecticut. And two partial days at Springfield City Library and that's plenty. I could be working more, but attending chair yoga, reading, and watching my fish seems to take up an awful lot of time.

Of course, I'm doing many other things. We managed a trip to the Clark Art Institute to see the Van Gogh and Nature exhibit (wonderful) and will be heading back to the Berkshires next week for a production of Comedy of Errors by Shakespeare & Company. Sunday, we did the annual "Vermont trip". We went to the flea market in Jacksonville where we spent money on things we do not need (although everyone can use 2 more beer glasses). Then visited the fun shops in Brattleboro where we managed not to buy anything except an excellent dinner on the deck of the Whetstone Brewery.

Friday, we're heading east to my hometown for my 50th High School reunion. I'm feeling a little odd about it. I have not seen any of these people since the 25th reunion. I didn't keep up with any of them for more than a couple of years, and even then, only a few.

Where did those 50 years go? I've spent much of them working. Now it's time for fun and relaxation.